Nepaug Bible Church -
Men's Leadership Support Group Meeting notes -

Part IX: Relating Effectively Toward All Others Based On The Family Model
(1 Timothy 5:1-6:2)
  1. Introduction
    1. Many books have been written on what should constitute the proper "style" of leadership: some hold a leader should rule others, or set goals or be a "people person," etc. Some teach these various styles should be used at various times for various reasons, so we should use the right style as the situation dictates.
    2. Scripture presents a simple approach, one that is easy to understand and apply (as follows):
  2. Relating Effectively Toward All Others Based On The Family Model, 1 Timothy 5:1-6:2.
    1. As we found in Lesson I, Christian leadership is the same in essence in the Church, family or societal realms, for society is composed of many homes, and according to 1 Timothy 3:5, a man knows how to lead in the Church based on effectiveness in leading his own home.
    2. Accordingly, the Apostle Paul urged Timothy to relate to other people in general as though they were members of his own family, a truth repeatedly manifested in 1 Timothy 5:1-6:2 (as follows):
      1. In 1 Timothy 5:1-2, Paul briefly urged Timothy to relate to older and younger men and women as though he was related to them as his fathers and brothers or mothers and sisters respectively.
      2. Having made this generalization re: relationships, Paul focused on relating to widows who had special needs, putting a high priority on family relationships involved (as follows), 1 Timothy 5:3-10, 11-16:
        1. Toward older widows, Timothy was to see that they were honored by first being supported by financially able extended family members before the Church financially supported them, 5:3-8, 16.
        2. Then, those older Christian widows who had no extended family that could support them were to be supported providing they themselves had a track record of good family ministry that had been applied to treating other believers well based on her role as a woman in a family, 1 Tim. 5:9-10.
        3. As for younger widows, Paul urged Timothy not to support them as a Church lest they turn from true godliness and be destructive toward other homes in laziness and lust; rather, they were to remarry and get back into the role as wives and mothers of children, 1 Timothy 5:11-15.
      3. Since he had expanded on the family model pattern of older and younger widows, Paul turned his attention toward the treatment of elders in greater detail in 1 Timothy 5:17-25. In doing so, we again see the great underlying emphasis on treating elders respectfully as one would a revered father:
        1. Elders who ruled well in the Church were to receive double honor: they were to be honored because of their position alone, and honored above that if they happened to serve well as elders, 6:17a.
        2. Elders who ministered the Word effectively were to be particularly honored as kind of a third tier of honor, for they had a position of respect, they ministered well in that role and they taught the people God's Word that was central to their spiritual welfare, 1 Timothy 5:17b (cf. 1 Timothy 4:16).
        3. Elders ministering well were to be financially supported, 1 Timothy 5:18 with Deut. 25:4; Lk. 10:7.
        4. If an elder had allegedly sinned, Timothy was not to accept the charge against him unless it came by way of multiple witnesses; this would protect the honor of the elders in question, 1 Timothy 5:19.
        5. If an elder was found guilty, he was to be impartially rebuked by other ruling elders before the body to protect the rest of the congregation from following him in his sin, 1 Timothy 5:20-21!
        6. Timothy was thus to go slow to assign men as elders, letting time reveal their character, 5:22, 24-25.
        7. Timothy as an elder was to use common sense in relation to alcoholic beverages: though it was fine to abstain from drinking to avoid a bad testimony as an elder, he was to use some alcohol to meet his medicinal needs that his health stay good for maintaining good performance as an elder, 5:23.
      4. Then, moving out of the relationships Timothy was to have with other men and women in the Church, Paul spoke of relationships in the workplace, applying the family model there as well, 1 Timothy 6:1-2!
Lesson: To relate effectively to others in leadership, God wants us to view other people in the Church, workplace, family, etc. as THOUGH they were LIKE members of our FAMILY. Thus, the various STYLES of leadership noted in secular works will all be used in the proper ways and right times, and that with ready understanding and ease as they will be based on the well-known family model!

Application: May we view ALL men as SIMILAR to members of our FAMILY, and so relate to them!